A lot of things kinda happened and a lot of things did not actually happen since summer. I am not quite sure what happened in the summer to be honest. It was all very fuzzy.
I remember having a feeling that I should google somebody’s latest username and voila! It came up on POF. Of course, when I clicked on that link, nothing was to be found. This was in late August or early September. A few weeks later I deleted my OKCupid account. I decided to give new and improved POF a whirl. How do I fit into the now absent married option for relationship status and also, no intimate encounters in the intent section.
I took that as a challenge.
I think of myself as rather creative as far as filling out profile goes. As for relationship status, “not single, not looking” is redundant so I opted for an outright lie – Single. See? Creative.
Not having the in-your-face straight up option of letting people know that you are seeking friend/s with benefits, ticking “casual dating, no commitment” is a logical choice. Surely those who are elated at not having to deal with openly married people seeking intimate encounters are able to discern… yeah, never mind.
I was fresh out of ideas when I opened my account the second time around on POF. I kept it short. In fact, it was so short it made little sense. But the messages were coming in. I have no idea why. Maybe because this time I lied about my age again (yes, I know but I actually do NOT look my age). I also decided sod it, I am posting my face pics. I replied to very few messages if at all. I filtered out people over 36 years old.
I received a message from someone who is 35. He referenced what I said in my profile regarding the Griswolds and made mention of the characteristics of people who live in our little area. I responded, we chatted over a course of less than a week and he asked if I wanted to meet up. This person covered the basics, seemed legit and most importantly, he wrote in complete sentences. Not only that, he also spells out every word and used paragraphs to break up his thoughts. What more could a girl ask for?
This person’s characteristics, mannerisms and appearance matched his perfectly crafted messages. At a glance, he would appear to be stodgy but nothing could be further from the truth. He was a little bit nervous (so he admitted to me) but after a few sips of Bloody Mary, he was more relaxed. Our conversation flowed and of course I had to tell him I am not actually 36. He thought I was younger than 30ish. He asked me what was my secret (several times). I told him to not eat crap or too much. He appeared amused by my simple answer.
We spent a few hours talking; drinking; dancing and inevitably, my vibrant personality took over. The night ended and morning came on a very high note. I do not remember the last time I had that much fun with a total stranger. It was fun because he was not concerned about spending time talking and doing things that two friends would do.
This scenario is less likely to repeat itself. This is not my fault. It the the fact that he is not actually single (ha!) either. Unlike my lying on POF though, he is in a tricky position is all I can say.
I suppose I could say something interesting happened the past 12 months besides the retarded Hipster. That and the fact I am ending the year once again, dry as the desert. Yeap.
The challenge of dieting for a beach body or any type of body at all is not complete until you embark upon the journey at a time when alcohol flows like it is going out of style. So, do not tell me eating less or stopping your “well-deserved” fat-free, sugar-free & gluten-free confections is difficult. Man up and ditch everything your body does not need in the first place during the holidays at least once in your life and then we will talk.